i'm not always here

I would always be there for you…

I would never hurt you…

I would always say I miss you…

I would keep saying your name in my dreams..

I would look at the dark sky…

Picking out the brightest stars…

To accompany you forever…

But…

The reality is not as beautiful as it seems…

There are times when sun would not shine…

The clouds become grey…

The sky turns dark…

Rain would wet the earth with tears…

None the less…

My Heart is always yours…

No matter how busy I am…

No matter how much I neglect…

No matter how sick I am…

I will always miss you…

I will always love you…

Even though…

You hate me for what I am now…

I will always say sorry…

Because I love you…

And I can’t lose you anymore…

Dreaming of Tears

I’m smiling with you by myside,

Hand in hand together,

Filling the gaps between our fingers,

Around the world we linger,

Cause I want to be with you forever,

Together we sang our song,

Laughing happily all day long,

Sometimes we would fight more than we could bare,

Because that’s the way we showed we care,

You would always take the blame,

And I’m always the one in shame,

Because I am your man,

I should protect you with all I can,

Finally we fought one day,

I was alone left astray,

Now my heart was tainted,

And dreams we built shattered,

Now I watch myself crumbled,

I tried to get up but stumbled,

Then I woke up shockingly,

I realize I was in reality,

The nightmare I had was so true,

It made my face turned blue,

Wishing it never happened,

With the love not been broken,

As I walked through the rain,

Hoping to love over and over again,

Then my heart broke into two,

When I saw the dream came true,

Left alone drenched in rain,

Now my heart filled with pain,

www.qalbuhearthati.blogspot.com 

Losing you was all that I fear,

Now I’m holding back my tears,

I wish you’re here wiping it away,

I wish you’re here and stay,

Now all the memories you bury,

The letters and pictures you deleted easily,

Your love was never forever,

But I kept my promise to never love another…

everything happens for a reason...

given hurt, given pain...

but..

given love again and again...

how I try not to cry...

how I try not to sigh...

you come and go...

out of the flow...

pushing me down..

i'm like a clown...

following you day and night...

until you're out of my sight...

only the shadows are near...

now and forever i'm always here...


p/s: ikan kekek sedap..nyum3.. ^_^

Apa Kata Hati - 3

pantai UMT

klik pada gambar kalau takleh baca...

Apa Kata Hati - 2

Ibu Permata Hatiku

ibu..emak..ummi..mama..

tidak kira apa jua nama..

perananmu tetap sama..

Dalam satu jasad selama 9 bulan..

keluhanmu tidak pernah kedengaran..

kau alunkan selawat untukku..

kau dendangkan AlQuran untukku...

agar aku bisa membanggakanmu...

agar aku bisa membantumu..

ketika aku lapar..kau suapkan..

walaupun perutmu kekosongan...

oh ibu...

ketika aku terjatuh...kau bangunkan..

ketika aku sakit...kau ubatkan...

ketika aku menangis..kau kesatkan...

ibu...kau sentiasa ada waktu aku perlukan..

oh ibu....

aku sayang dirimu...

kerna kau..permata hatiku...

Last Epistle for the Last Battle

i'm observing the white mist,

with hundred of soldiers fully armed,

we are preparing for war,

fighting using neither sword nor armors,

not a cavalry or a group of archers,

we are ready to depart,

waiting for the blow of war horns,

battling with questions and answers,

hand in hand with paper and pen,

arguing with theories and facts,

clashing heart and minds,

chasing over the swords of time,

bloods of sweat feel the atmosphere,

suddenly a fair maiden pass by,

her fragrance took me aback,

through the battlefield she glide,

what a scene i could not hide,

then she smiled and dance,

my heart was in her trance,

my body and feet were paralyzed,

oh, I couldn't blink my eyes,

a snap made me blinking,

oh I was only dreaming,

she stood up and started walking,

oh how my heart was already thumping, 

her cape and veil was black and blue,

oh how i wish i said 'i love you',

she didn't notice now i see,

i was a pitiful being there to be,

so, i sat there alone to mourn,

till most of the time already gone,

what should i do what should i say,

i know there's no other way,

now I'm all alone, with pen and papers 

write the answers should i ever,

All I can do now is sit and pray,

to Allah I shall ask,
hope He shows me the right path,

to love someone that's not mine,

i seek forgiveness and a sign,

should i hope should i care..

about the love i could not bear..

unspoken words i wanna say,

before we go our separate ways,

caring and praying is all i can do,

how i wish you feel the same way too.. 

Tears of Loneliness

In the midst of midnight,

with the moon high above,

accompanied by the twinkling stars,

My crystal tears rolled down,

making my face a little frown,

my smile even flew away,

with all the joy during the day,

as i sat on the wide green grass,

all the stress i try to express,

with pen and paper i could hold,

all my writings become bold,

what should i do to forget,

all i do is remorse and regret,

now my tears running down spry,

without you, my heart feels empty,

missing you is not an option,

its a curse could never be broken,

loving you was all i had,

taken away makes me really sad,

nobody knows what we've been through,

the one understands is only me and you,

that's why we are in pain,

that's why we are in vain,

i don't know about you,

but what i said was the truth,

tonight the pillow is drenched,

with the blanket on the bed,

i tried so hard with all my might,

but the memories keep holding me tight,

now i know, now i see,

with you that i wish to be,

no further shall i seek,

it's you that my heart really needs,

no matter how i try to replace,

you in my heart a special place,

sleeping is not easy as it seems,

really hope to meet you in my dreams,

to Allah we should worship,

May Allah help our relationship...

~AMEEN~

Storm of Love

lying upon the wet turf...

pair of love birds perched in silence..

watching them makes me wonder..

love exists in every being..

sometimes it hurts to love..

sometimes it hurts being loved..

mostly love invites comforts..

During the pouring season..

the coldness strikes...

the moist enters the room..

the body trembles to the loneliness frost..

blankets of love covers the body...

the warmth of care ignites the soul...

the comfort of love fills the heart...

but now, everything has perished..

blown by the clash of hurricane..

bits of memories shattered...

tiny glass struck the soul within..

crystal tears floods the abyss of love..

only your reflection visible by the watery eyes...

now i'm drowning because of you..

in the hectic storm of frustation..

grief and regret strikes...

as much as the lightning and thunder

how i wish you were here..

how i wish this never occur..

how i wish we are together..

how i wish we are forever...

Crazy For Love

Walking by the beach..alone..,

feeling the breeze,

inhaling the fresh air,

enjoying the sound of waves,

recalling the days together,

People said we were sweet,

but now my heart bleeds,

for you the tears fall,

because of you, i gave my all,

as now i am bleeding,

but somehow you are laughing,

the wrong doings now i atone,

since you left me all alone,

people pointed fingers at me,

since i'm the culprit as you can see,

now, people said our LOVE was crazy,

Now people said you cared not for me,

now people said we were not meant to be,

now people told me to stop chasing,

because you keep on running,

now people told me to start forgetting,

because my heart is aching,

now people told me to concentrate,

on my studies and recuperate,

but ONE thing they don't know,

without you i'm in sorrow,

I gave it all to you,

my heart, my love and my dreams,

i never wanted anything,

just i need you back again,

only you that i need,

and only you that i seek...

You're The ONE

I never wanted to LOVE,

I never wanted to CARE,

I never wanted to DREAM,

I wanted NOTHING,

Suddenly you came,

You vandalized my nothingness heart,

You hung your picture on the wall,

You placed roses in every corner,

Your smell filled the space,

My heart was totally yours,

Suddenly you left,

leaving everything behind,

leaving your memories,

leaving our memories with me,

it tore my heart into pieces,

What should I do?

You're the ONE

That put the tears in my eyes,

You're the ONE

That put the tears in my heart,

I LOVED YOU and NO OTHER

You're the ONE that said GOOD-BYE

Don't you know,

Because of you...I learned to LOVE

Because of you...I learned to CARE

Because of you...I learned to SMILE

Because of you...I learned to LAUGH

Because of you...I learned to DREAM

Because of...YOU'RE THE ONE

Lost Without You

Walking through dark woods,

I gazed upon the shining star,

while the moon glared,

I stood waiting,

waiting for something,

something undescribable,

Now I know,

I'm Lost...

I tried calling for help,

but i was mute...

I wanted to run,

but my legs stood still...

I felt like crying,

but my tears dried up...

What should I do??

I wish there was someone,

I wish someone would help,

I wish someone would lend a hand,

I wish someone would pull me away,

I wish someone would even care,

I wish someone would love me,

I wish that someone was YOU....